Indian Business Strategy

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House in D.C. One from Bangladesh, another from India and the third, from China.
They go with a White House official to examine the fence.
The Bangladesh contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil. "Well", he says, "I figure the job will run about $900. ($400 for materials, $400 for my team and $100 profit for me)".
The Chinese contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says, "I can do this job for $700. ($300 for materials, $300 for my team and $100 profit for me)".
The Indian contractor doesn't measure or figure, but leans over to the White House official and whispers, "$2,700."
The official, incredulous, says, "You didn't even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure!
The Indian contractor whispers back, "$1000 for me, $1000 for you, and we hire the guy from China to fix the fence."
"Done!" replies the government official.

FACTS OF LIFE

[1] Regular naps prevent old age, especially if you take them
while driving.

[2] Having one child makes you a parent; having two you are a
referee.

[3] Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always
right and the other is the husband!

[4] I believe we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried -
but they wanted cash.

[5] A child's greatest period of growth is the month after
you've purchased new school uniforms.

[6] Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent.

[7] Don't marry the person you want to live with, marry the
one you cannot live without, but whatever you do, you'll
regret it later.

[8] You can't buy love, but you pay heavily for it.

[9] Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.

[10] Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before
you get tired.

[11] Marriage is give and take. You'd better give it to her or
she'll take it anyway.

[12] My wife and I always compromise. I admit I'm wrong and
she agrees with me.

[13] Those who can't laugh at themselves leave the job to
others.

[14] Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner.

[15] A successful marriage requires falling in love many times,
always with the same person.

[16] You're getting old when you enjoy remembering things
more than doing them.

[17] It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his
job, he still ends up with the same boss.

[18] Real friends are the ones who survive transitions between
address books.

[19] Saving is the best thing. Especially when your parents
have done it for you.

[20] Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools
talk because they have to say something

[21] They call our language the mother tongue because the
father seldom gets to speak!

[22] Man: Is there any way for long life?
Dr: Get married.
Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but then the thought of long life will never come.

[23] Why do couples hold hands during their wedding? It's a
formality just like two boxers shaking hands before the
fight begins!

[24] Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we
do?
Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

[25] It's funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs
Arranged. It's like asking someone, if suicide is better
than being murdered.

[26] There is only one perfect child in the world and every
mother has it.

[27] There is only one perfect wife in the world and every
neighbour has it.

NINE MONTHS LATER

NINE MONTHS LATER

Jack decided to go skiing with his buddy, Bob. So they loaded up Jack's mini van and headed north. After driving for a few hours, they got caught in a terrible blizzard. So they pulled into a nearby farm and asked the attractive lady who answered the door if they could spend the night. 'I realise it's terrible weather out there and I have this huge house all to myself, but I'm recently widowed,' she explained. 'I'm afraid the neighbours will talk if I let you stay in my house.' 'Don't worry ,' Jack said. 'We'll be happy to sleep in the barn. And if the weather breaks, we'll be gone at first light.' The lady agreed, and the two men found their way to the barn and settled in for the night. Come morning, the weather had cleared, and they got on their way. They enjoyed a great weekend of skiing. About nine months later, Jack got an unexpected letter from an attorney. It took him a few minutes to figure it out, but he finally determined that it was from the attorney of that attractive widow he had met on the ski weekend. He dropped in on his friend Bob and asked, 'Bob, do you remember that good-looking widow from the farm we stayed at on our ski holiday up north about 9 months ago?' 'Yes, I do 'said Bob'. 'Did you, ER, happen to get up in the middle of the night, go up to the house and pay her a visit?' 'Well, um, yes,' Bob said, a little embarrassed about being found out, 'I have to admit that I did.' 'And did you happen to give her my name instead of telling her your name?' Bob's face turned beet red and he said, 'Yeah, look, I'm sorry, buddy. I'm afraid I did.' 'Why do you ask?' 'She just died and left me everything.' (And you thought the ending would be different, didn't you?... I know you smiled...now keep that smile for the rest of the day!)

Doll Story......!! nice one

There was once a man and a woman who had been married for more than sixty years. They had shared everything. They had talked about everything. They had absolutely no secrets from each other except that the little old woman had a shoe box in the top of her closet that she had cautioned her husband never to open or ask her about.

One day, after many, many years, the old woman got very sick, and the doctor said she would never recover. The woman knew it was about the time to reveal her little secret to her husband, and asked him to take down the box and bring it to her bedside. When the man opened it, he found two crocheted doilies and a stack of money in the total of $25,000. The man asked his wife about the contents.

"When we were to be married," she old woman said, "my grandmother told me the secret of a happy marriage was to never argue. She told me that if I ever got angry with you I should just keep quiet and crochet a doilie."

There were only 2 doilies in the box. The man was beyond himself with joy. His wife was angry with him only twice in all the years of their happy marriage and love! "Honey," he said, "that explains the doilies, but what about all of this money? Where did it come from?" "Oh," she said, "that's the money I made from selling the doilies."

Plan B !! nice story

A pretty woman was serving a life sentence in prison. Angry and resentful about her situation, she had decided that she would rather die than to live another year in prison.

Over the years she had become good friends with one of the prison caretakers. His job, among others, was to bury those prisoners who died in a graveyard just outside the prison walls. When a prisoner died, the caretaker rang a bell, which was heard by everyone. The caretaker then got the body and put it in a casket. Next, he entered his office to fill out the death certificate before returning to the casket to nail the lid shut. Finally, he put the casket on a wagon to take it to the graveyard and bury it.

Knowing this routine, the woman devised an escape plan and shared it with the caretaker. The next time the bell rang, the woman would leave her cell and sneak into the dark room where the coffins were kept. She would slip into the coffin with the dead body while the caretaker was filling out the death certificate. When the care-taker returned, he would nail the lid shut and take the coffin outside the prison with the woman in the coffin along with the dead body. He would then bury the coffin. The woman knew there would be enough air for her to breathe until later in the evening when the caretaker would return to the graveyard under the cover of darkness, dig up the coffin, open it, and set her free.

The caretaker was reluctant to go along with this plan, but since he and the woman had become good friends over the years, he agreed to do it.

The woman waited several weeks before someone in the prison died. She was asleep in her cell when she heard the death bell ring. She got up and slowly walked down the hallway. She was nearly caught a couple of times. Her heart was beating fast. She opened the door to the darkened room where the coffins were kept. Quietly in the dark, she found the coffin that contained the dead body, carefully climbed into the coffin and pulled the lid shut to wait for the caretaker to come and nail the lid shut.

Soon she heard footsteps and the pounding of the hammer and nails. Even though she was very uncomfortable in the coffin with the dead body, she knew that with each nail she was one step closer to freedom. The coffin was lifted onto the wagon and taken outside to the graveyard. She could feel the coffin being lowered into the ground. She didn't make a sound as the coffin hit the bottom of the grave with a thud. Finally she heard the dirt dropping onto the top of the wooden coffin, and she knew that it was only a matter of time until she would be free at last. After several minutes of absolute silence, she began to laugh. She was free! She was free! Feeling curious, she decided to light a match to find out the identity of the dead prisoner beside her.

To her horror, she discovered that she was lying next to the dead caretaker.

Many people believe they have life all figured out..... But sometimes it just doesn't turn out the way they planned it.

Always think of having 'Plan B’!

A farmer has three sons -- Joke

A farmer has three sons.

One day, his oldest boy comes to him and pleads with him
that he is graduating from school and would really like
to get a car.

His father says, "Son, come with me."

He takes him to the barn and points to the farm tractor
and says, "That tractor is needed here on the farm and
I promise that as soon as it's paid for, we'll get you
a car."

The boy was not too happy but he did understand that
situation and said, "Okay, Dad."

A week later, his second son (10 years old) approaches
him wanting a new two-wheel bicycle.

Well, he gets the same excuse. "as soon as that tractor
is paid for."

Shortly, a few days later, son number 3, his youngest,
comes bugging him for a tricycle.

Again, ol' Dad gives him the lecture about the tractor
being paid for first.

While leaving the barn, the young boy, more than a
little disgusted with the whole thing, sees a rooster
mating with one of the hens and promptly goes over and
kicks the rooster smooth off the hen's back, mumbling
to himself the whole time.

His dad says, "Son, why on earth would you do something
like that? He didn't do anything to you to deserve that!"

The little boy looks his Dad right square in the eye and
says, "Hey, nobody rides anything around here until that
damn tractor is paid for!"

story tortoise and a hare

Once upon a time a tortoise and a hare had an argument about who was faster .

They decided to settle the argument with a race. They agreed on a route
and started off the race.

The hare shot ahead and ran briskly for some time.
Then seeing that he was far ahead of the tortoise, he thought he'd sit under
a tree for some time and relax before continuing the race. He sat under
the tree and soon fell asleep.

The tortoise plodding on overtook him and soon finished the race, emerging as the undisputed champ.

The hare woke up
and realized that he'd lost the race.

The moral- "Slow and steady wins the race. This is the version of the
story that we've all grown up with."

THE STORY DOESN'T END HERE

there are few more interesting
things.....it continues as follows......

The hare was disappointed at losing the race and he did some
soul-searching.
He realized that he'd lost the race only because he had been overconfident,
careless and lax.
If he had not taken things for granted, there's no way the tortoise could have beaten him. So he challenged the tortoise to another race.
The tortoise agreed. This time, the hare went all out and ran without
stopping from start to finish. He won by several miles.
The moral - " Fast and consistent will always beat the slow and steady.
It's good to be slow and steady; but it's better to be fast and reliable."

THE STORY DOESN'T END HERE

The tortoise did some thinking this time, and realized that there's no
way it can beat the hare in a race the way it was currently formatted.

It thought for a while, and then challenged the hare to another race, but
on a slightly different route. The hare agreed. They started off. In keeping
with his self-made commitment to be consistently fast, the hare took off and
ran at top speed until he came to a broad river. The finishing line was a
couple of kilometres on the other side of the river.

The hare sat there
wondering what to do.
In the meantime the tortoise trundled along, got into the river, swam to the opposite bank, continued walking and finished the race.

The moral - "First identify your core competency and then change the
playing field to suit your core competency."

THE STORY STILL HASN'T ENDED

The hare and the tortoise, by this time, had become pretty good friends
and they did some thinking together.

Both realized that the last race could
have been run much better So they decided to do the last race again, but to
run as a team this time.

They started off, and this time the hare carried the tortoise till the riverbank. There, the tortoise took over and swam
across with the hare on his back. On the opposite bank, the hare again carried
the tortoise and they reached the finishing line together. They both felt a
greater sense of satisfaction than they'd felt earlier.

The moral - "It's good to be individually brilliant and to have strong
core competencies; but unless you're able to work in a team and harness each
other's core competencies, you'll always perform below par because
there will always be situations at which you'll do poorly and someone else
does well. Teamwork is mainly about situational leadership, letting the person
with the relevant core competency for a situation take leadership.
Note that neither the hare nor the tortoise gave up after failures. The
hare decided to work harder and put in more effort after his failure. The
tortoise changed his strategy because he was already working as hard as
he could."

In life, when faced with failure,
sometimes it is appropriate to work
harder and put in more effort.

Sometimes it is appropriate to change strategy and try something different.

And sometimes it is appropriate to do both.

The hare and the tortoise also learnt another vital lesson. When we stop competing against a rival and instead start competing against the
situation, we perform far better.

To sum up- the story of the hare and tortoise has much to say: Chief among them are that fast and consistent will always beat slow and steady;work to your competencies; pooling resources and working as a team will always beat individual performers; never give up when faced with failure; & finally, compete against the situation - not against a rival.

A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the
Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.

He asked, "What are all those clocks?"

St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a
Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move."

"Oh," said the man, "whose clock is that?"

"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating
that she never told a lie."

"Incredible," said the man". And whose clock is that one?"

St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands
have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire
life."

"Where's President Bush's clock?" asked the man.

"Bush's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."